Cartoon Dumb Contest 2
by THP
Summary: Yep, it's back again and it's funnier, stupider, and even more plotless. Sorry it took sooooo long to update. Well R&R Chap. 2 is up!
1. Default Chapter

Hiya I'm real sorry I took sooooooo long to update. Cuz me and Ion Deity had so many brainstorms we completely forgot to do them. So here's a REAL treat for all you patient people it's (drum roll) CARTOON DUMB CONTEST 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAAAAAAAA BOOYAAAA LES GET THIS PARTY STARTED. (silence) uh It's gonna be funny? (applause) ok les get this started.  
Disclaimer: I own nothing except me ands this stupid plot and Ion Deity owns himself.  
Here we find our heroes/thieves um nowhere to be found. Wait is that Batman?  
Batman: I am vengeance, I am the night, I am BATMA- (gets pushed off by a dark figure)  
THP: uh oops? Oh well. I am Trigger happy, I am strange, I am BATMA- I mean THP!!!  
Uh why don't we find Ion Deity? What the, Superman?  
Superman: (flying to save the town from a monster) I will kill the monster and- huh?  
  
Ion Deity: (is flying by superman) Hi I'm gonna go save those people then loot the bank, could you hold this? (gives him kryptonite) Treat yourself good and buy something nice when you sell it. (flies off)  
  
Superman: Wait this isn't any green rock this is (starts falling) can't feel heart, brain, or lasagna I had for lunch. (crashes)  
  
Hobo#1 from original Cartoon Dumb Contest: Cool free food (eats superman)  
Uh is this really meant for kids?  
  
THP: Yeah  
  
Narrator: Hey you can hear me?  
  
THP: Well duh I only wrote this.  
  
Narrator: Oh yeah.  
  
THP: I feel bored.  
  
Narrator: Then keep typing.  
  
THP: Why?  
  
Narrator: Because I said so.  
  
THP: Ya know I could blow you up with my author powers.  
  
Narrator: Uh but you wouldn't right?  
  
THP: Nah  
  
Narrator: Phew  
  
THP: I'll have Fang eat you  
  
Narrator: What?! NO you can't!  
  
THP: Watch me. (whistles)  
  
Fang: FANG HUNGRY FANG WANT EAT!  
  
Narrator: He talks? THP: No that's a tape recorder on his collar.  
  
Narrator: Oh. AHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOO!!!!!! (gets eaten)  
  
Fang: (falls asleep)  
  
THP: I'm still bored, wait I know.  
  
Ion Deity: (falls out of plot hole)  
  
Audience: (falls out of another plot hole)  
  
Patrick, Ed, and G.I.R.: (Fall out of THP's pants)  
  
Hobo#1: (walks in)  
  
Ion Deity: Why are we here?  
  
THP: I was bored oh and two more things  
  
Deadly Sins and VEGETA: (fall out of a plot hole)  
  
THP: Can you guess wut time it is?  
  
IonDeity: lunch time?  
  
Hobo#1: I like donuts?  
VEGETA: (looks at watch) 12:34?  
  
THP: -_- no its (really corny music tune thingy) CARTOON DUMB CONTEST 2!!!!!!!  
  
IonDeity: YIPPEEE SKIPPY AND WE CAN EAT PIE!  
  
New narrator: Hi  
  
THP: what no, impossible you're supposed to come in a bunch of fanfics from now when we cross into the sonic world.  
  
Narrator: Hi I'm Omachao I'm here to help you.  
  
THP, Ion Deity, and VEGETA: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH KILL THE EVIL DEMON.  
  
Deadly Sins: Who the hell is omocaho?  
  
THP: A really annoying robot flying thingy from sonic adventure 2 that gives you useless info on stuff you already know.  
  
VEGETA: MUST KILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!  
  
THP: Tie him down with chains  
  
Ion Deity: (salutes) aye aye sir.  
VEGETA: (gets chained down) I THOUGHT I WAS YOUR FRIEND YOU MOTHER F!$^&#  
  
THP: ya well I cant have any bloody violence yet.  
  
VEGETA: fine..  
  
Omochao: you haven't killed me you do like me yayzies  
  
THP: (grins evilly) Oh THP Jr  
  
Chaos chao with evil grin: yrrm yuffnem  
  
THP: kill the bad robot and daddy will take you to the amusement park.  
  
THP Jr: (happy look on face and then whistles)  
  
Other chao: Gameer grrmm  
  
THP: fine you guys get to go too but remember the next time you appear its gonna be in the sonic fic I make.  
  
All the chao: OKEY DOKIES  
  
THP: didja just talk?  
  
All the chao: umm no?  
  
THP: 0_0 ok just kill omochao.  
  
All the chao: (slowly descend upon omochao)  
  
Omochao: no, no, NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! (is covered by chao then explodes)  
  
THP: that takes care of that aw crap we're outta time.  
  
Deadly Sins: Well until next time remember we  
  
VEGETA: can I kill someone?  
THP: maybe in the next chapter  
  
VEGETA: fine fine  
  
THP: Oh and one more thing Author of "The chao show" you're cool and also the author of "College Days" and "College Days Year 2" is cool too.  
  
Ion Deity: hey how come the contestants didn't say anything?  
Ed: Cuz it is pineapple season on top of our slowly decaying mentally confusing and physically disorientating brains.  
  
Patrick: I don't think we're in Kansas anymore.  
  
G.I.R.: Why must the sun set on thy face of my dear Juliet.  
  
Everyone: O_O  
  
Chao: Theme Park! Theme Park! Theme Park!  
  
THP: ok ok lets go.  
  
Deadly Sins: ok lets end this and go see Austin Powers Goldmember.  
  
Everyone: YAY!  
  
VEGETA: WHAT ABOUT ME?  
  
Ion Deity: We'll bring ya back some popcorn.  
  
VEGETA: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!  
THP: Sorry this took soooooo long me and ion were on starcraft a lot.  
  
Ion Deity: Yuppers  
  
THP: So R&R or my chao will see sadness in their daddy's eyes and come to kill you BWAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAH.  
  
Chao: (in really erie unison and with glowing eyes) R&R make daddy happy.  
  
Ion Deity: Next chapter should be up soon. BYE ^_^ 


	2. Round 1 and plastic surgery

Hey peeps how's it going? Yes, I know I haven't updated in forever, BUT that shall all change from now on because my cable connection has been fixed and I won't need to play video games endlessly, but I will anyway. Anyway on with the fic.  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing that belongs to other people such as those big companies like Sega, Nintendo, Slappy Wacky Gay Duckman's, and aw forget it you know what I mean.  
  
THP: We're back!  
  
Ion Deity: And we like pie!  
  
THP: Duh.  
  
Ion Deity: Your mean.  
  
THP: No, due to internet quizzes I have found that I am the SA2:Battle character Sonic, DBZ character Goku, and many many more.  
  
Ion Deity: Shadow's better.  
  
THP: No, Sonic.  
  
Ion Deity: Shadow.  
  
THP: Sonic.  
  
Ion Deity: Shadow.  
  
THP: Sonic.  
  
Ion Deity: Shadow.  
  
THP: Sonic.  
  
Ion Deity: SHADOW!  
  
THP: SONIC!  
  
Patrick: EGGMAN!  
  
Ed: TAILS!  
  
G.I.R.: KNUCKLES!  
  
VEGETA: I SHALL ANHILATE YOU WITH MY BAMBOO STICK YOU BITCH!  
  
THP: Ok let's get started.  
  
Ion Deity: Question 1, Who is (reads to see if this is correct) ummmm….who is the greatest dictator that ever lived?  
  
All three: HITLER!  
  
Deadly Sins: -5 points awarded.  
  
THP: What's your favorite TV show?  
  
Patrick: Diarrhea. (hears laughs from the audience) oh sorry, What is diarrhea.  
  
G.I.R.: THP has a crush on an author!  
  
THP: uhhhhhh no comment.  
  
Ed: THE ARMPITS ARE ATTACKING!  
  
Ion Deity: Wait, what did G.I.R. say? Are you gay?  
  
THP: HELL NO!  
  
VEGETA: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!  
  
Deadly Sins: Must….resist…..laughing….too..funny…..AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Deadly Sins and VEGETA: (Look at each other) AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHASHA HHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA HAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
THP: (slumps to the ground and turns red)  
  
Ion Deity: Who is it?  
  
THP: (takes a PANZERSCHREK from his trench coat) DIE MORTALS!  
  
Ion Deity: I'm a demon though.  
  
THP: (fires it in random directions blowing up many things, and people) ROOOOOAAAAARRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!  
  
VEGETA: HA! YA MISSED ME. Wait, my manhood senses are tingling. (Looks down where his manhood should be) HOLY SHIT! YOU BASTARD! I'LL KILL YOU.  
  
Deadly Sins: Well you really did it this time G.I.R. So before we all die, who is it?  
  
G.I.R.: Who's what?  
  
Deadly Sins: What author does THP like?  
  
G.I.R.: HI MR. OATMEAL MAN MAY I HAVE SOME MOTOR CARS WITH WEIRD AL CD'S?  
  
Deadly Sins (I'm gonna call him D.S. from now on): Nut bunnies.  
  
THP: (stops firing) Wait, you mean you don't know?  
  
Ed: I DO! HERE IT IS. (pulls out a chicken) I LOVE CHICKENS EDDY!  
  
Patrick: No, it's this. (Reaches into his belly button and pulls out a bunch of YU-YU-HAKUSHO videos)  
  
^^^^^^^At a plastic Surgeon's^^^^^^^  
  
VEGETA: (At a plastic surgeon's) So doc, they have the same functions as regular balls right?  
  
Doctor Nick: Yup and they're equipped with laser beams.  
  
VEGETA: Can I not have the laser beams?  
  
Dr. Nick: Ok, but that just takes away the fun. Here we go. (Begins surgery) The blue thing's connected to the something, the something's connected to the red thing, the red thing's connected to my wristwatch, uh oh.  
  
^^^^^At the studio^^^^^^  
  
THP: Uh, sorry about that, ^_^;  
  
Ion Deity: Your lucky I'm immortal and I'm uninjured besides the huge gaping hole in my chest.  
  
THP: (Like Ace Ventura) Allllllllrigggghttyyy then.  
  
DS: What four characters does Mike Meyers play in "Austin Powers: Goldmember?"  
  
Fat Bastard: I want my baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back RIIIIIBBBBSSS!  
  
THP: Hey fatty.  
  
Fat Bastard: Ya know I'm not fat anymore, I went on the subway diet, remember, all that extra skin.  
  
THP: Oh yeah.  
  
Patrick: Sperm is for sex.  
  
G.I.R.: SHAKESPEAR BITES!  
  
Ed: STEVEN KING GREW MUTANT POWERS AND IS WREAKING HORRIFIC HAVOC UPON THE CITY TO BRING HIS HORROR STORIES TO LIFE CUZ HE'S COOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
THP: Patrick gets 2 points for the disgusting lesson, G.I.R. gets 3 points because it was accurate information, and Ed gets 6 points cuz Steven King IS cool.  
  
Ion Deity: Amen to that.  
  
DS: I like pie.  
  
Audience: PIE! PIE! PIE! PIE!  
  
Fat Bastard: Wire Fighting Attack Maneuver time! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!  
  
THP: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!  
  
Ion Deity: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!  
  
DS: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Audience: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! G.I.R.: YAAAAAYYYYY, I MEAN AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Ed: SAVE ME FROM THE CYCLOPS!!!!  
  
Patrick: JELLY FISHING! JELLY FISHING!!!!!!!!!  
  
VEGETA: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY DAMN BALLS!!!!!!  
  
Dr. Nick: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! I'VE NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE!!!  
  
VEGETA: WHAT!?  
  
Some Japanese Guy: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hot soup.  
  
Fat Bastard: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! (is pulled in the air by some wires, goes flying, does a bunch of flips, and lands in "Saggy Skinned Subway Diet Dudes And Dudetts Rehabilitation Center")  
  
Guy that works at center: *Gasp* This man is in great need of healing. FIRE UP THE MAGMA!!!!  
  
Fat Bastard: Aw crap.  
  
THP: Poor guy. Oh well back to the show. So what are your answers for this question: THP has a crush on…. HEY WHO WROTE THIS?  
  
Some guy in the audience: Yes I know who it is and it is ( is suddenly dragged through the floor by many tiny arms)  
  
THPjr: (hops out of the hole) GLEEERRRRRRRMMMMMNEEECK!!!!!!!  
  
Shows a shadow of a guy being burnt to a crisp by a bunch of flames that just ignited by some little chao carrying flamethrowers. The chao then jump out in a single file line salute and dive back into the hole with THPjr following.  
  
VEGETA: (holding his "area") How many chao do you have?  
  
THP: Enough to blow up Mars.  
  
DS: (Whistles) Wow.  
  
Ion Deity: Too bad they have a limit to how many you can have.  
  
THP: Yeah, but I have SA2:Battle and SADX so that means lotsa chao for me.  
  
Ion Deity: Yeah, same here.  
  
THP: Well that's all the time we have today but, remember…..  
  
Audience: THP LIKES-(they suddenly explode)  
  
DS: (like nelson) HA HA!  
  
THP: Peace out.  
  
THP: How didja guys like it? And it took so long to update because FF.net for some reason wouldn't let me post stories but, I'M BACK!  
  
Ion Deity: Finally.  
  
THP: Well see ya and if you know what author I like, well, you'll meet THPjr personally. R&R. 


End file.
